The best disgusting jokes

Two hunters are stalking through the forest when one says to the other that he has to take a dump. "Well, go in the bushes." "What should I use to wipe my ass?" "Use a dollar bill." A few minutes later the hunter steps out of the bushes with s**t all over his hands. "What happened?" asks his friend. "I didn't have a dollar bill, so I used four quarters."
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, hunting, money
What did the tampon say to the other tampon in school? I'll see you next period.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, school
What does a cannibal eat with cheese? Pickled organs.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, food
An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are wandering through the desert, hungry and hallucinating, when they come upon a rotting, dead camel. "Well," said the Englishman, "I support the Liverpool football club, so I'll eat the liver." "I support the Hearts club," said the Scotsman, "so I'll eat the heart." "I support Arsenal," said the Irishman, "but I seem to have lost my appetite."
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, football
Q: Why doesn't Tigger have any friends? A: He plays with Pooh.
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting
"Where are you going to take Vampira on your date?" asked one vampire. "Oh, I thought we'd go to the movies, and then get a quick bite."
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: dating, disgusting
One day God came to Adam to pass on some news. "I've got some good news and some bad news," God said. Adam looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first." Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things and have intelligent conversations with Eve. The other organ I have for you is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your life form and populate this planet. Eve will be very happy that you now have this organ to give her children." Adam, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?" God looked upon Adam and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time." Then, God came to Eve to pass on some news too. "I've got some good news and some bad news," God said. Eve looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first." Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things and have intelligent conversations with Adam. The other organ I have for you is called a vagina. It will allow you to reproduce your now intelligent life form and populate this planet. Adam will be very happy that you now have this organ to give him children." Eve, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts you have given to me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?" God looked upon Eve and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time. While you're bleeding through one of them every 28 days, the other will remain useless."
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has 50.61 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, god, kids
Q: What would Princess Diana be doing if she were alive today? A: Clawing at the lid of her coffin.
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has 50.53 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, disgusting
Boy while kissing his girlfriend: "Thank u baby... For give me your chewing gum.." Girl says, "This is not chewing gum my love. I’m suffering from cough!"
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has 50.27 % from 125 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, love
Q: What did the pedophile say when he was released from prison? A: "I feel like a kid again."
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has 50.21 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, kids, prison
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