The best disgusting jokes

Q: What's the difference between pea soup and roast beef? A: Anyone can roast beef.
Vote: has 46.10 % from 8 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, food
Q: How does a redneck tell the difference between a bull and a cow in the dark? A: He sticks his nose in the animal's ass. If there's a place for his tongue, it's a cow.
Vote: has 45.78 % from 41 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, disgusting, redneck
Q: What's brown and taps on the window? A: A baby in a microwave!
Vote: has 45.58 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, disgusting
A man goes into a psychiatric hospital to visit one of his buddies. As he is walking out he notices a guy pretending to be swinging a hockey stick. Curious, he asks: "What are you doing?" The guy replies: "I'm Wayne Gretzky, and I'm practicing my shot." Satisfied with the answer the visitor moves on down the hall. He notices another guy pretending to be playing golf. Curious, he asks: "What are you doing?" The guy replies: "I'm Tiger woods and I'm practicing my golf." Satisfied with this response the visitor again moves on down the hall. He then sees another guy sitting in a chair in the nude with a jar of peanuts beside him. This guy takes a peanut, places it on his dick, waits a minute, then flicks into his mouth. Again, curious he asks: "What are you doing?" The guy replies: "I'M FUCKING NUTS!"
Vote: has 45.29 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting
How is a soyburger like a dildo? They're both substitutes for meat.
Vote: has 45.10 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, masturbation
What's grosser than gross? Two vampires fighting over a bloody tampon. What's grosser than that? Finding a used condom on the bottom of a mayonnaise jar. What's grosser than that? When you open the refigerator and the rump rost farts in your face. You want to know what's grosser than that? When you sit on your grandpa's lap and he pops a boner. But the one thing that is grosser than that is when you are siting on your grandma's lap and she pops a boner.
Vote: has 44.92 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting
Q: What did the butcher say when he backed into the meat-grinder? A: Looks like I'm getting a little behind in my work!
Vote: has 44.92 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, work
Bob: "Hey, Sue, why is there a tampon hanging out of your mouth?" Sue: "Oh my God. What did I do with my cigarette?"
Vote: has 44.92 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, god
Q: How do you get a zombie baby into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Doritos.
Vote: has 44.46 % from 19 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, disgusting
Q: What's red, sits in front of a mirror, and gets smaller and smaller? A: A vain idiot combing his hair with a potato peeler.
Vote: has 44.46 % from 19 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, food, stupid


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