Q: What has two legs and bleeds? A: Half a cat.
Q: What did Jeffrey Dahmer do after dumping his boyfriend? A: He wiped.
Q: What is 40 feet long and smells like urine? A: Line dancing at a nursing home.
Q: What's red, sits in front of a mirror, and gets smaller and smaller? A: A vain idiot combing his hair with a potato peeler.
What's grosser than gross? Two vampires fighting over a bloody tampon. What's grosser than that? Finding a used condom on the bottom of a mayonnaise jar. What's grosser than that? When you open the refigerator and the rump rost farts in your face. You want to know what's grosser than that? When you sit on your grandpa's lap and he pops a boner. But the one thing that is grosser than that is when you are siting on your grandma's lap and she pops a boner.
Q: What do you call someone who doesn't fart in public? A: A private tooter.
what is the diffrent between a chicken and a prostute chicken goes cockadoodle do prostute goes any cock will do.
Q: Why does a dog lick himself? A: He can't make a fist.
What do you get when you eat a prune pizza? Pizzeria!
What do you call an abortion in Czechslovakia? A cancelled Czech!