Q: How do you eat a frog? A: You put one leg behind each ear.
What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? When you take sausage out of the fridge it doesn't fart.
An asp in the grass is a snake, but a grasp in the ass is a goose.
What do you call an abortion in Czechslovakia? A cancelled Czech!
Q: Why are men like diapers? A: They are always on your ass and full of sh*t, and thankfully, they're disposable.
"Mommy, Mommy! Where have all your scabs gone?" "Shut up and eat your corn flakes."
"How are your hemorrhoids?" "Swell."
Q: What is 40 feet long and smells like urine? A: Line dancing at a nursing home.
What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea? A salad shooter.
Q: What did Jeffrey Dahmer do after dumping his boyfriend? A: He wiped.