Bob: "Hey, Sue, why is there a tampon hanging out of your mouth?"
Sue: "Oh my God. What did I do with my cigarette?"
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Q: How does a redneck tell the difference between a bull and a cow in the dark?
A: He sticks his nose in the animal's ass. If there's a place for his tongue, it's a cow.
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Q: How do you get a zombie baby into a bowl?
A: A blender.
Q: How do you get them out?
A: Doritos.
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Q: What's red, sits in front of a mirror, and gets smaller and smaller?
A: A vain idiot combing his hair with a potato peeler.
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Another name for a vagina is a cockpit
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What's red and sits in a corner?
A baby playing with a razor blade.
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What do you get when you cross Billy Ray Cyrus with a yeast infection?
An itchy, twitchy twat!
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Q: What does it look like when you microwave a baby?
A: I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.
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Q: How do you know a gay guy has farted?
A: He needs to change his pants afterward.
Q: What does a plumber need to know about his job?
A: Sh*t runs downhill and payday is on Friday.
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