I still don't understand why smoking weed makes you a criminal...
When I smoke it the only thing I a threat to is cake.
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Q: What does a cooked chicken and a stoner who is afraid of everything have in common?
A: They are both baked chickens.
A busload of retired Americans was touring Switzerland.
On the third day, they visited a farm known for its excellent quality goat cheese.
The young farmer's wife gave them a tour, a cheese making a demonstration, and finally some samples.
As the retirees were tasting the cheeses, she pointed to a pasture full of goats.
She said, "This is a special pasture where we let our older goats graze happily after they can no longer give milk. In the United States, what do you do with your old goats?"
An old lady piped up, "Honey, they take us on bus tours."
How do you suffocate a nigger?
Tell him there's weed inside the pillowcase.
Vote:
Q: What do you call a stoner spilling his weed on the floor?
A: Drug Abuse.
A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money.
The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, “Well, son, it was 1932.
The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel.
“I invested that nickel in an apple.
I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents.
“The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples.
I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents.
I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I’d accumulated a fortune of $1.37.”
“And that’s how you built an empire?” the boy asked.
“Heavens, no!” the man replied. “Then my wife’s father died and left us two million dollars.”
Q: How do you know when you are stoned?
A: When you are too phoned to stone home.
Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
Vote:
Yo Momma so stupid, she thought seaweed is something fish smoke.
If the sea was weed and i was a duck i'd swim my way down and smoke my way up, but the sea ain't weed and i'm not a duck so pass me the bong and shut the fuck up