Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft.
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It was tough for me, got caught up: cutting class, drinking, smoking, gambling, raping and pillaging the town.
What I'm trying to tell you is the fifth grade was hell for me, alright?
Chuck Norris beat Super Mario Galaxie 2 in the big dipper... before Nintendo was invented.
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The first time Chuck Norris won a game of poker was when his apponant reaveled his full house; then Chuck Norris reaveled his roundhouse.
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Peter goes golfing every Saturday.
One Saturday, he comes home tired and five hours late.
His wife asks him, "What took you so long?"
Peter says, "That was the worst game of golf I've ever had.
We got up to the first tee, and Harry hit a hole-in-one and immediately dropped dead of a heart attack."
Peter's wife says, "OMG!
That's terrible!"
Peter says, "I know.
Then, for the rest of the game, it was hit the ball, drag Harry, hit the ball, drag Harry, hit the ball, drag Harry. . ."
Chuck Norris already has Final Fantasy XXI.
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Superman and The Flash have a race around the world.
Who wins?
Chuck Norris.
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How do you start a teddy bear race?
Ready, teddy, go.
Yo mama so fat that when she played Xbox live you can see her face sticking out of your tv screen.
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Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek."
He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."
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