The best health jokes

Chuck Norris once round house kicked a fat kid in the stomach and his foot print stayed their until the kid lost the weight.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, fat, health, kids
What do you get if you cross a cow with a tension headache? A bad mood.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, health
There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: flirt, health, romantic
A 92-year old woman had a full cardiac arrest at home and was rushed to the hospital. After about thirty minutes of unsuccessful resuscitation attempts the old lady was pronounced dead. The doctor went to tell the lady's 78-year old daughter (who wasn't blonde any longer, but just had to be at one time) that her mother didn't make it. "Didn't make it? Where could they be? She left in the ambulance forty-five minutes ago!" the former blonde asked.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, blonde, death, health, hospital
Q: How did the medical community come up with the term "PMS"? A: "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken.
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: health, insulting, medical, women
Q: Why was the lesbian sick? A: She was lacking vitamin D.
Vote: has 58.09 % from 41 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: health, lesbian
What's funnier than cancer? Most things, really.
Vote: has 57.92 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, health
„And, Johnny? How did your school report turn out?" asks mother. „Come on mom, the most important thing is that I'm healthy!"
Vote: has 57.55 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: health, little Johnny, school
A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
Vote: has 57.36 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Halloween, health, kids
There are bats hanging of a branch upside down, all except one. Two bats comment: "What's happened to this one? I don't know, two minutes ago he seemed normal and then he fainted.
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, health