Only Chuck Norris can cross the "Beyond" section of Bed, Bath and Beyond store.
Chuck Norris is so powerful he can jumpstart a car by attaching the cables to his chest hair.
Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
I before E except after Chuck.
Clark Kent had to call himself "Superman" because "Chuck Norris" was already taken.
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.
Before going to bed, the Boogeyman always checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris eats blackholes as light snacks.
If Chuck Norris was in a video game it would be called Immortal Kombat.
Chuck Norris has a Roundhouse Kick button on his Facebook page, and when he deletes a friend they actually die.
In fourth grade, a teacher edited Chuck Norris's essay. Big mistake. You don't edit Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris edits you... with his fist.