Chuck Norris is the reason Pluto is no longer a planet.
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Chuck Norris went up the creek without a paddle... or a canoe.
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When Chuck Norris donates blood, he gives twenty gallons.
None of it is his own.
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When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack.
Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
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Chuck Norris ate a sheet of paper, then later found an origami swan in the toilet.
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Chuck Norris can locate the nowhere.
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My Prediction for the Mayweather Mcgregor fight.
It becomes a Handicap Match against Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris ends it with a single roundhouse kick before the bell stops ringing.
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Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek."
He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."
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The moon is just a football Chuck Norris kicked up when he was a kid.
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Solar flares are a myth... it's really Chuck Norris' flashlight.
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Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
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