What book did the rabbit take on vacation?
One with a hoppy ending.
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Gemma:My dog doesn't have a nose.
Ortoise: How does he smell?
Gemma: Awful!
Q: What do you get when you cross a perm with a rabbit?
A: Curly hare.
Customer: "Waiter, there’s a dead beetle in my soup."
Waiter: "Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers."
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow wh-
Moooooo!
Vote:
I heard my tire thumping, I thought it was flat.
When I looked at my tire I discovered your cat.
Sorry...
Q: Why do gorillas have big noses?
A: Because they have big fingers!
What do you call a lion wearing a cravat and a flower in its mane?
A dandy lion.
What is a Zebra?
A Z-bra is 25 sizes bigger than an A-bra.
The FAA has a device for testing the strength of windshields on airplanes. They point this thing at the windshield of the aircraft and shoot a dead chicken at about the speed the air-craft normally flies at it. If the windshield doesn't break, it's likely to survive a real collision with a bird during flight.
The British had recently built a new locomotive that could pull a train faster than any before it. They were not sure that its windshield was strong enough so they borrowed the testing device from the FAA, reset it to approximate the maximum speed of the locomotive, loaded in the dead chicken, and fired. The bird went through the windshield, broke the engineer's chair, and made a major dent in the back wall of the engine cab.
They were quite surprised with this result, so they asked the FAA to check the test to see if everything was done correctly. The FAA checked everything and suggested that they might want to repeat the test using a thawed chicken.