There are no comets.
Only people that Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked so hard that they are now in permanent orbit in our solar system.
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Chuck Norris doesn't ask, "who's your daddy?"
Chuck Norris is your daddy.
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Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to.
He knows CPR.
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Chuck Norris texts with punctuation.
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Chuck Norris once broke the sound barrier.
In half.
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When Chuck Norris gets pulled over he read the officers his rights.
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One time Chuck Norris saluted an American flag and it blushed.
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What happens when Chuck Norris orders a beer and gets a beer?
He roundhouses the waitress, Chuck Norris should not have to ask.
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Chuck Norris can speak braille.
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Chuck Norris can make a dog bark the alphabet, in spanish, backwards.
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The Godfather once came to Chuck Norris and asked for a favor.
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