There are no comets.
Only people that Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked so hard that they are now in permanent orbit in our solar system.
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Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Chuck Norris.
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What you call a wrecking ball, Chuck Norris calls a punching bag.
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Chuck Norris can hear the sound of one hand clapping.
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We live in an expanding universe.
All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
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The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris.
The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction.
No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
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Chuck Norris wanted more dialogue for his next movie.
It was too short for release.
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Chuck Norris once played The Price Is Right.
The prices attempted to guess the numbers Chuck Norris was thinking of.
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Hurricane Katrina wasn't the weather... it was the wind of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick from Texas to Louisiana.
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When I was a kid, my Chuck Norris action figure broke all my other toys while I was at school.
When my mom tried to throw him away, he killed her.
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