There are no comets.
Only people that Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked so hard that they are now in permanent orbit in our solar system.
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Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light.
Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris looks at IEDs and the trigger man blows up.
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Chuck Norris eats gummy bears and shits out grizzly bears.
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During vacation my front door's open and I left a note saying "This house is protected by Chuck Norris 3 days a week you guess which 3."
All was good.
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Some check under their beds for "Penny Wise the Clown" before to sleep.
Penny Wise the Clown checks for Chuck Norris under his bed before going to sleep.
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When Chuck Norris falls out of a boat , he dosn't hit water...
That's because Chuck Norris would never fall out of a boat it the first place.
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When Chuck Norris enters a sauna the sauna starts sweating.
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When Chuck Norris sets his watch, he sets time itself.
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Chuck Norris can skydive indoors.
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Chuck Norris caught the gingerbread man.
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