Chuck Norris doesn't chew gum.
Chuck Norris chews tin foil.
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Chuck Norris once made a crippled man run away.
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Chuck Norris doesn't get sun burnt; that would be a foolish thing for the sun to do.
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Chuck Norris only needs one bullet, because it should know to get back in the chamber.
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On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers.
He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
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Chuck Norris always wins at Jenga, the tower couldn't dare to crumble.
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When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.
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Scientists called it a big bang, Chuck Norris called it an alarm clock.
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Chuck Norris climbed the stairway to heaven, and came back down again.
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If there's something strange...
In your neighborhood... Who ya gonna call?...
CHUCK NORRIS!
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Out of 500 fights Chuck Norris has won 600.
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