Chuck Norris can paste something before he copies it.
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Chuck Norris can paint the rainbow... with black.
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Chuck Norris speaks english, french, spanish, italian and portuguese.
At the same time in every sentence.
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Chuck Norris is a man of few words.
Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.
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Chuck Norris watched the tape from The Ring.
His phone rang and when he answered a scared voice said "Excuse me, the wrong number"
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When everyone else can't, Chuck Norris CAN.
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Chuck Norris is standing right behind you when you're reading this.
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When Chuck Norris says 'Candyman' five times in a row, no one appears.
Candyman ain't stupid.
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Chuck Norris does not need deodorant because sweat instantly runs away.
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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For his surprise 50th birthday party, Chuck Norris turned up early.
No one surprises Chuck Norris.
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