Which rabbit was a famous female aviator? Amelia Harehart.
What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a pig? (A teddy boar!)
Q: How do you get ten fat cows in your basement? A: Hold a tupperware party!
Chuck Norris once taught a French Bulldog to be English.
What happened when the shark became famous? He tured into a starfish.
Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it.
How are black people and wolves similar? They both fight in packs.
What do you call a dumb bunny? A hare brain.
What do you call a bull that runs into a threshing machine? Hamburger.
Two little squirrels were walking along in the forest. The first one spied a nut and cried out, "Oh, look! A nut!" The second squirrel jumped on it and said, "It's my nut!" The first squirrel said, "That's not fair! I saw it first!" "Well, you may have seen it, but I have it," argued the second. At that point, a lawyer squirrel came up and said, "You shouldn't quarrel.Let me resolve this dispute." The two squirrels nodded, and the lawyer squirrel said, "Now, give me the nut." He broke the nut in half, and handed half to each squirrel, saying, "See? It was foolish of you to fight. Now the dispute is resolved." Then he reached over and said, "And for my fee, I'll take the meat."
An astronomer, a physicist and a mathematician are on a train in Scotland. The astronomer looks out of the window, sees a black sheep standing in a field, and remarks, "How odd. Scottish sheep are black." "No, no, no!" says the physicist. "Only some Scottish sheep are black." The mathematician rolls his eyes at his companions' muddled thinking and says, "In Scotland, there is at least one field, containing at least one sheep, at least one side of which appears black from here."