Joke #10385

Which rabbit was a famous female aviator? Amelia Harehart.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Two Middle East mothers are sitting in a cafe chatting over a plate of tabouli and a pint of goat’s milk. The older of the mothers pulls a bag out of her purse and starts flipping through photos. And they start reminiscing. "This is my oldest son Mohammed. He would be 24 years old now." "Yes, I remember him as a baby" says the other mother cheerfully. "He’s a martyr now though" mum confides. "Oh, so sad, dear" says the other. "And this is my second son Kalid. He would be 21." "Oh, I remember him," says the other happily, "he had such curly hair when he was born." "He’s a martyr too" says mum quietly. "Oh, gracious me…" says the other. "And this is my third son. My baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He would be 18," she whispers. "Yes" says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first started school." "He’s a martyr also," says mum, with tears in her eyes. After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks wistfully at the photographs and says, "They blow up so fast, don’t they?"
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has 68.77 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, black humor, food
Why did the gray whale go on a diet? Because he wasn't a Fin whale.
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish, food
What do you call a tired cow? Milked out.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
I’ve never understood why women love cats. Cats are independent, they don’t listen, they don’t come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they’re home they like to be left alone and sleep. In other words, every quality that women hate in a man they love in a cat.
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has 58.52 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal
How did the close race between the rabbit and the tortoise end? It was won by a hare.
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man goes to a party and has too much to drink. His friends plead with him to let them take him home. He says no -- he only lives a mile away. About five blocks from party, the police pull him over for weaving and ask him to get out of the car and walk the line. Just as he starts, the police radio blares out a notice of a robbery taking place in their area. The police tell the drunk party animal to stay put, they will be right back and they hop a fence and run down the street to the robbery. The guy waits and waits and finally decides to drive home. When he gets there, he tells his wife he is going to bed, and to tell anyone who might come looking for him that he has the flu and has been in bed all day. A few hours later the police knock on the door. They ask if Mr. SMITH is there and his wife says yes. They ask to see him and she replies that he is in bed with the flu and has been so all day. The police have his driver's license. They ask to see his car and she asks why. They insist on seeing his car, so she takes them to the garage and opens the door where they find their police car, with the lights still flashing.
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has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, car, cop, party
Why was the horseman fired from his job of saddle testing? He was always standing up on the job!
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal, work
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road without looking both ways? "Dead."
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has 34.87 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal, death
At a conference on the supernatural, one of the speakers asked, “Who here has ever seen a ghost?” Most of the hands go up. “And how many of you have had some form of interaction with a ghost?” About half the hands stay up. “Okay, now how many of you have had *physical* contact with a ghost?” Three hands stay up; there’s a slight murmur in the crowd. “Gosh, that’s pretty good. Okay, have any of you ever, uh…, been *intimate* with a ghost?” One hand stays up. The speaker blinks. “Gosh, sir, are you telling us that you’ve actually had *sexual* contact with a ghost?” The fellow suddenly blushes and says, “Oh, I’m sorry,… I thought you said goat!”
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has 76.88 % from 144 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, sex
Knock, knock. Who's there? Owls say. Owls say who? Yep, that they do.
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has 70.38 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, communication, knock-knock