What kind of noise annoys an oyster? A noisy noise annoys an oyster. (Try saying that fast!)
What do you get if you cross a cow with a spaniel, a poodle, and a rooster? A cockerpoodlemoo.
A Democrat walks into a doctor's office with a frog sitting on his head. The frog looks at the doctor and says, "Hey doc, can you get this wart off my ass?
Yo' Mama is so ugly, her face looks like a horse's ass flapping in the breeze.
Q: What does an elephant use as tampon? A: A sheep.
Is Snoop serious? Or is Snoop Lion?
Q: Why did the atheist throw her watch out the window? A: She wanted to see if it was designed intelligently enough to evolve into a bird.
How are tigers like sergeants in the army? They both wear stripes.
How come sharks don’t attack lawyers? From professional courtesy.
How did cows feel when the branding iron was invented? They were very impressed.
What's green with red spots? A frog with the chicken pox!