Chuck Norris doesn't use a fire extinguisher to put out fires... he just tells the fire to stop burning.
Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.
When Chuck Norris visits Africa, the animals are required to stay in their cars.
I challenged Chuck Norris once. He made a bun with my legs over my head, then he roundhouse kicked me to outer space. Now I read the facts from Mars.
God created Adam, Adam saw Chuck Norris, Adam created tears.
The role of terminator was originaly played by Chuck Norris, but they decided against it as no-one would want to shit their pants for two hours strait.
According to leading scientists, the deadliest animal on the planet is the Bearded Norris.
The movie Unstoppable is based on Chuck Norris' morning jog.
Chuck Norris dropped the apple on Isaac Newtons Head.
When batman is in trouble, he turns on the Chuck Norris signal.
Chuck Norris could actually win on Takeshi's Castle.