Why couldn't the rabbit fly home for Easter?
He didn't have the hare fare.
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Q: Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs?
A: He doesn't want anyone to know he's f**king chickens.
Q: Why was the Easter Bunny so upset?
A: He was having a bad hare day!
What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long?
A runny bunny.
Q: How do you know the Easter Bunny is really smart?
A: Because he's an egghead.
What do you call a rabbit who works in a bakery?
A yeaster bunny.
Where do rabbits go after their wedding?
On their bunnymoon.
Jesus won't come back again.
Why?
Because he know you will kill him and see if he will wake up again.
When is the best time to fake an orgasm?
When a rottweiler is humping your leg.
A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands.
He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.
The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"
My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."
Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?"
He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."