Joke #10486

How do you hire a teddy bear? Put him on stilts.
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has 42.03 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal

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A man climbed over a fence into a field to pick some flowers. He noticed a bull nearby. Say, farmer "Is that bull safe?" "Well, he's a lot safer than you are right now!"
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has 62.04 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: animal
A mean horseman went into a saddler's shop and asked for one spur. "One spur?" asked the saddler. "Surely you mean a pair of spurs, sir?" "No, just one," replied the horseman. "If I can get one side of the horse to go, the other side is bound to come with it!"
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
There's two fish in a tank, and one says ''How do you drive this thing?''
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal
Little Johnny: „Mom, can I get a dog at Christmas, please?"  Mother: „No, you'll be getting turkey, like every year!"
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has 50.71 % from 102 votes. More jokes about: animal, Christmas, dog, food, little Johnny
What's at the end of Moby Dick? A whale of a time.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, time
One day, Little Johnny's grandmother sent him to the water hole to get some water for cooking dinner. As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes looking back at him. He dropped the bucket and ran back to grandma's house as fast as he could. "Where's my bucket and my water?" She asked. "I can't get any water from that water hole, there's a mean ol' alligator down there!" "Now don't you mind that ol' alligator, Johnny. He's been there for years, and he's never hurt no one. Why, he's probably as scared of you as you are of him!" "Well, Grandma," replied Johnny, "if he's as scared of me as I am of him, then that water ain't fit to drink!"
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has 81.80 % from 596 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, little Johnny
Which rabbit stole from the rich to give to the poor? Rabbit Hood.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why do gorillas have big noses? A: Because they have big fingers!
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has 29.93 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man takes his wife to the stock show. They start heading down the alley that had the bulls. They come up to the first bull and his sign stated: “This bull mated 50 times last year.” The wife turns to her husband and says, “He mated 50 times in a year, you could learn from him.” They proceed to the next bull and his sign stated: “This bull mated 65 times last year.” The wife turns to her husband and says, “This one mated 65 times last year. That is over 5 times a month. You can learn from this one, also.” They proceeded to the last bull and his sign said: “This bull mated 365 times last year.” The wife’s mouth drops open and says, “WOW! He mated 365 times last year. That is ONCE A DAY! You could really learn from this one.” The man turns to his wife and says, “Go up and see if it was 365 times with the same cow.”
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has 81.57 % from 176 votes. More jokes about: animal, time, wife
Q: Why can't scientists find a cure for AIDS? A: They can't get the laboratory mice to arse f*ck.
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has 46.07 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, health, science, sex