What's the difference between a tiger and a lion?
A tiger has the mane part missing.
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What kind of cars do rabbits drive?
Hop rods.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with an elephant?
An elephant who never forgets to eat his carrots.
What do you call an easy-going rabbit?
Hoppy-go-lucky.
How do you get a hundred cows in a barn?
You hang up a bingo sign!
What do you call a rabbit who is real cool?
A hip hopper.
A very respected Captain in the Foreign Legion was transferred to a remote desert outpost.
On his orientation tour he noticed a very old seedy looking camel tied out behind the enlisted men’s barracks.
He asked the Sergeant leading the tour, “Why is a camel tied to the barracks?”
The Sergeant replied, “Well sir, it’s a long way from anywhere, and the men have natural sexual urges, so when they do … uh … we have the camel ready for them.”
The Captain said, “Well, I suppose if it’s good for morale, then I guess it’s all right with me”.
After he had been stationed at the fort for six long, lonely months, the Captain simply couldn’t control his sexual angst any longer.
He barked to his Sergeant: “BRING THE CAMEL INTO MY TENT!”
The Sergeant shrugged his shoulders, looked at the other men, and lead the camel into the Captain’s quarters.
Within a few minutes, the Captain emerged from his tent, fastening his trousers, almost beaming with pride.
“So, Sergeant, is that how the enlisted men do it?” he asked.
The Sergeant replied, “Well, sir, usually they just use it to ride into town.”
The mommy Cobra with her little son are taking a “walk”.
The little cobra asks; "Mommy, are we poisonous?"
"Yes, we are. Why you ask?"
The little cobra asks again; "Are you sure that we’re poisonous?"
"Yes I am!" says the mom with pride.
The little one asks again; "Are you very very sure that we’re very poisonous?"
"Damn sure! We’re the most poisonous snakes in the whole world! But why you ask?"
The little cobra burst into tears; "Cause I bit my tongue a bit before!"
A skunk family had two little skunks they called In and Out.
One day little In disappeared. Mother Skunk, Father Skunk and young Out spent hours looking for him, getting more worried all the time.
In the end the parents went home to have a cup of tea, but Out said he d continue searching for a while.
Half an hour later he returned home, with a tired In following behind him.
"However did you find him?" asked Father Skunk.
"In-stinct," replied Out.
What looks like half a cat?
The other half.
