What is a chameleon's motto?
A change is as good as a rest.
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Why did the bareback performer ride his horse?
Because it got too heavy to carry.
What game do little cows like to play?
Moonopoly.
Teacher: Students, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?
Class: "Brotherly love."
Customer: "Waiter, do you serve crabs?"
Waiter: "Please sit down sir, we serve everyone."
What do you call a herd of cows in a psychiatrists office?
An encownter group.
What does a spider do when he gets angry?
He goes up the wall!
Q: What is height of De-hydration?
A: A cow giving milk powder.
How does a frog confuse you?
When he comes out and says he needed that nap and feels much better.
Q: What do you call a cow playing with its self?
A: Beef stroganoff.
A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the stranger turned to the Little Johnny and said, "Let's talk. I've heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger."
Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said to the stranger, "What would you like to discuss?"
"Oh, I don't know," said the stranger.
"How about nuclear power?"
"OK," said Little Johnny.
"That could be an interesting topic.But let me ask you a question first."
"A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat grass.
The same stuff.
Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass.
Why do you suppose that is?"
"Jeez," said the stranger.
"I have no idea."
"Well, then," said Little Johnny, "How is it that you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know shit?"
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