Joke #10558

What is a chameleon's motto? A change is as good as a rest.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Why is a reindeer like a gossip? Because they are both tail bearers.
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has 44.92 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
One afternoon I was walking on a trail with my baby daughter, chatting to her about the scenery. When a man and his dog approached, I leaned down to the carriage and said, “See the doggy?” Suddenly I felt foolish talking to my baby as if she understood me. However, just as the man passed, he reached down, patted his dog, and said, “See the baby?”
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, dog
Q: Why do beavers spend a fortune on the Internet? A: They never want to log off.
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has 74.72 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, internet, money
A guy walked into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He put the alligator up on the bar. He turned to the astonished patrons and said, "I'll make you a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. Then the gator will close his mouth for one minute." He'll then open his mouth and I'll remove my unit unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink. The crowd murmured their approval. The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers, and placed his privates in the alligator's open mouth. The gator closed his mouth as the crowd gasped. After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and rapped the alligator hard on the top of its head. The gator opened his mouth and the man removed his genitals unscathed as promised. The crowd cheered and the first of his free drinks were delivered. The man stood up again and made another offer. "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try." A hush fell over the crowd. After a while, a hand went up at the end of the bar and a woman timidly spoke up. "I'll try, but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with a beer bottle."
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has 70.92 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: animal
What is a cow's favourite TV show? Dr Moo.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
Where do you find a down-and-out octopus? On squid row.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
Walking into the bar, Mike said to Charlie the bartender… "Pour me a stiff one – just had another fight with the little woman." "Oh yeah?" said Charlie "And how did this one end?" "When it was over," Mike replied, "she came to me on her hands and knees." "Really," said Charles, "now that's a switch! What did she say?" "She said, 'Come out from under the bed, you little chicken.'"
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has 80.33 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, women
Knock, knock. Who's there? Owls say. Owls say who? Yep, that they do.
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has 64.60 % from 136 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, communication, knock-knock
Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Megasoreass.
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has 68.59 % from 604 votes. More jokes about: animal, gay
Why did Bossy tell the cowpoke to leave her calf alone?  She thought children should be seen and not herded!
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal