What do you get if you cross a skunk and a balloon?
A creature that stinks to high heaven.
Similar jokes
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Q: What type of bees make milk?
A: Boo-bees.
Two snakes were crawling along when one snake asked the other, "Are we poisonous?"
The other replied, "You're darn right we are! We're rattlesnakes. Why do you ask?"
To which the first replied, "Because I just bit my tongue"
Two Bear Hunters
Two men went bear hunting.
While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear.
He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it.
The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could.
He ran pretty fast but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step.
Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat.
Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin.
The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go and get another one!"
What hair style is a calf's favorite?
The cowlick.
Q: What do you call a frog who wants to be a cowboy?
A: Hoppalong Cassidy.
Q. What's black and white and green?
A. A frog sitting on a newspaper.
During camouflage training in Louisiana, a private disguised as a tree trunk had made a sudden move that was spotted by a visiting general.
"You simpleton!" the officer barked.
"Don't you know that by jumping and yelling the way you did, you could have endangered the lives of the entire company?"
"Yes sir," the solder answered apologetically.
"But, if I may say so, I did stand still when a flock of pigeons used me for target practice.
And I never moved a muscle when a large dog peed on my lower branches.
But when two squirrels ran up my pants leg and I heard the bigger say, "Let's eat one now and save the other until winter' - that did it!"
Q: What's meaner than a pit bull with herpes?
A: The guy who gave it to him.
Vote:
An engineer crosses a road when a frog calls out to him, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."
He bends over, picks up the frog and puts it in his pocket.
The frog speaks up again and says, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week."
The engineer takes the frog out of his pocket, smiles at it and returns it to the pocket.
The frog then cries out, "If you kiss me and turn me back, I'll do whatever you say!"
Again the engineer takes the frog out, smiles at it and puts it back into his pocket.
Finally, the frog asks, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, I'll stay with you for a month and do whatever you say. What more do you want?"
The engineer says, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool!"
Two guys meet:
"Where were you lost my friend? says one of them."
"Well, I took my kids to the zoo..."
"And what kind of animals did you see there?"
"The tiger... Huge and Scary! Full of stripes... Slowly walking inside the cage. She was “ahgrrr...”
"Are you kidding me men? The tiger doesn’t go “ahgrrr..” … She “grrrrsss..”!
"Right, ok.. But when you get too close to her face... !"