Joke #10590

What do you get if you cross a skunk and a cartoon penguin? Pingu-Pong.

Yo' Mama is so fat, her Polo shirts come with real horses on the pocket.

Little Johnny wanted to go to the zoo and pestered his parents for days. Finally his mother talked his reluctant father into taking him. "So how was it?" his mother asked when they returned home. "Great," Little Johnny replied. "Did you and daddy have a good time?" asked his mother. "Yeah, daddy really liked it too," exclaimed Little Johnny, "especially when one of the animals came home at 30 to 1!"

Mama bear to Papa bear: "Well... You might call it hibernating — I call it goofing off ."

Lara Rabbit: "Do you think that's Sophie's natural color?" Zara Rabbit: "Only her hare dresser knows for sure."

What do you call the reindeer with one eye higher than the other? Isaiah.

Did you hear about the cannibal spider that ate his uncle's wife? He was an aunteater.

Every day after work two blondes would look for their cars together. Since they could never remember where they parked, they would sit around until all the cars were gone and they could spot their vehicles. One blonde says "We need to find a faster way to get home." The next day, they come to work on a donkey. After work they come out and see a donkey tied to the fence. "I think we're going to have to wait again, " says the one blonde. "I'm not convinced that's our donkey." "Why not?" asks the second blonde. The first blonde says, "Well, this donkey only has one a**hole, and this morning when we rode in, I distinctly overhead someone say, "Hey look at those two a**holes on that donkey."

Bears do not eat bears. Tigers do not eat tigers. Dogs do not eat dogs. Cats stopped eating kebabs.

Why did the rabbit have trouble hopping? Because he always kept one foot in his pocket for good luck.

What do you call a trash bag full of mutilated laboratory monkeys? Rhesus Pieces.