What happened to the skunk who failed his swimming lesson?
He stank to the bottom of the pool.
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What’s black and white and makes a lot of noise?
A zebra with a drum kit.
Q) What do you call a dog with no legs?
A) It doesn't matter, he won't come!
Q: What do you call a horse that plays the violin in a musical?
A: Fiddler on the hoof.
What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day?
A forty-carrot wedding ring.
What do you get if you cross a skunk and a balloon?
A creature that stinks to high heaven.
I applied for the position of a keeper at the zoo but turns out I was not koalafied.
I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.
Have you seen the offices of the RSPCA?
It’s tiny; you couldn’t swing a cat in there.
One day at the Ricki Lake Show, the topic was ghosts.
Before the show, she asks the audience: "Who here has ever sensed the presence of a ghost?" and 5 people raise their hand.
Then she asks "Who here has ever seen a ghost?" and 3 people raise their hand.
Then she asks "Okay, now who here has ever had sex with a ghost?" and 1 person, an old man raises his hand.
So she goes up to this old man and says "what was it like?" and he said "Oh…it was great! Never had any like it before!"
and she asked "Really? So the ghost was good?"
and the old man said "Ghost? I thought you said goat!"