What happened to the skunk who failed his swimming lesson?
He stank to the bottom of the pool.
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Little Susan was helping her mother to set the table, cause her father invited over his company managers.
When everybody sat on the table, her mother noticed that a flatware set was missing.
"Susan, why didn’t you put flatware on Mr. Marc’s seat?"
"I thought that I didn’t have to, since dad told us that Mr. Marc, eats like a pig…"
While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat.
He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft.
Spotting and old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,"Are there any gators around here?!"
"Naw," the man hollered back, "they ain't been around for years!"
"Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore.
About halfway there he asked the guy,"How'd you get rid of the gators?"
"We didn't do nothin'," the beachcomber said.
"The sharks got 'em."
What do you call a turtle with a hard on?
A slow poke.
I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.
Kangaroo 911: "What's your emergency?"
Kangaroo: "I can't find my children"
Kangaroo 911: "Did you check your pockets?"
Kangaroo: "Oh nevermind."
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What is the difference between a crazy bunny and a counterfeit banknote?
One is bad money and the other is a mad bunny.
What do you get if you cross a skunk and an owl?
A bird that stinks but doesn't give a hoot.
Did you hear about the rabbit who got a job in a watch factory?
Alike did was stand around making faces.
Q: What happened when the owl lost his voice?
A: He didn't give a hoot!
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