Joke #10652

What gas do snails prefer? Shell.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal

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One day there was a woman who lost her cat named "LOVE." It was pretty dark outside and she lived in New York. So, thinking that he might be down the street, she put on her house-coat and went looking for him. When a police officer stopped to ask what she was doing, she said very honestly, "I'm looking for LOVE." The policeman arrested her on the spot.
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has 37.02 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, cop, women
Why is it that if you give a child an encyclopedia, lawyer is always the third thing they look up? Because the first thing a child looks up is dog. The second is snake. And under snake, the encyclopedia says See Lawyer.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, lawyer
Did you hear about the cannibal spider that ate his uncle's wife? He was an aunteater.
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has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, wife
What is the fiercest flower in the garden? The tiger lily.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
The Teacher asked Little Johnny, "How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?" Little Johnny replied, "Just Don't bite any."
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has 76.59 % from 327 votes. More jokes about: animal, health, little Johnny, teacher
Chuck Norris was once bitten by a venomous cobra .... After 5 days of excrutiating pain the cobra Eventually died
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has 60.84 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
Turtle to turtle: "Don't ya just love the sound of rain on your roof?"
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, love, weather
Q: What goes "oom... oom"? A: A cow walking backward!
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication
What is a moo hoo for a delightful ranch owner? A charmer farmer.
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy. The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions. "Ever have an accident?" "Nope, nary a one." "None? You've never had any accidents." "Nope. Ain't had one. Never." "Well, you said in this form you were bitten by a snake once. Wouldn't you consider that an accident?" "Heck, no. That dang varmint bit me on purpose."
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has 66.18 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: animal, cowboy, life, stupid