Chuck Norris flosses with dynamite wick.
Chuck Norris doesn't sweat. He forces the air around him to cry and uses it's tears to cool himself.
When Jacques Cousteau reached the bottom of the sea he found Chuck Norris snorkeling.
Chuck Norris once won an underwater breathing contest with a fish.
Chuck Norris has only played Pacman twice, and beat the game both times. The ghosts were too afraid to leave their little box to try to stop him.
Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to. He knows CPR.
Chuck Norris once broke the sound barrier. In half.
Chuck Norris was banned from the Olympics because his mere presence is considered a performance-enhancing substance.
Chuck Norris is the greatest thing, period, despite his invention of sliced bread.
Chuck Norris stared in to the mirror and said, "There can only be one Chuck Norris." Then his reflection cried and walked away.
Extra Terrestrials often visit Earth from other galaxies - they're here to see if Chuck Norris really exists.