Chuck Norris can Moonwalk on the Sun.
When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.
Chuck Norris steps into the confession booth. The Priests confess his sins.
Chuck Norris has 5 bathtubs, they are known as the Great Lakes.
Chuck Norris doesent need a postage stamp... He just tells the letter where to go and it gets there.
Chuck Norris can smoke underwater.
Chuck Norris is allowed to draw pictures of Mohammad.
Chuck Norris doesen't fly, gravity collapses around him.
Chuck Norris is the only person that can stab you with a basketball- Brandon De La Riva.
All of Chuck Norris's opinions can be proven with science.
Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation. Chuck Norris needs toothpicks.