Chuck Norris made a statue bleed.
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Lou Gehrig considered himself the luckiest man on the face of the Earth, no one knew that it was because he was soon getting away from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris puts ice cube trays in the cupboard, and he gets ice.
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Facebook had a dislike button, then Chuck Norris joined.
Nobody dislikes Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek."
He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity - three times.
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Chuck Norris can see all 50 states from his house.
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Chuck Norris teaches math to solve its own problems.
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If Chuck Norris were a toy, you wouldn't play with him, he'll play with you.
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Chuck Norris cleans up crime... with a mop and bucket... full of people's blood.
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There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
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