Chuck Norris saw the Invisible Man.
Chuck Norris doesn't go on the Internet, he has every Internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.
Rome wasn't built in a day because they didn't ask Chuck Norris for help.
When Chuck Norris asks you to stop mid-sentence, you.
The Reapers in the Mass Effect series were actually Chuck Norris' baby toys.
Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died. The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible. All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.
Chuck Norris can see all 50 states from his house.
Chuck Norris was once tested for steroids. The results came back positive. When confronted with this information, Chuck Norris chuckled and said, "Of course, what do you think they make steroids from?"
Jurrasic Park is a second name for Chuck Norris' backyard.
Charles isn't in charge. Chuck is!