Chuck Norris told his iPhone 2g it was a iPhone 4. He can now multi task and use face time.
Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris. After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
Once chuck norris and time had race. Result: The time is still running.
When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
Night time... when Chuck Norris tells the sun it's time for bed.
Sundials tell the time according to the position of Chuck Norris.
I sent a reminder to a client that it was time to visit the eye doctor. He called back to inform me that he would not be coming in because, as he put it, "I have a new obstetrician."
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
The phrase "Just a second" comes from the time it takes for Chuck Norris to heat up a cup of coffee... with his breath.