Q: You know the Roman Empire, well how do you think it fell? A: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris does not understand any phrase that begins with "if at first you don't succeed."
The Highlander movie was actually based on Chuck Norris's life. There can be only one.
You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex? Because he never fucks up.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a wristwatch. He always knows when it's time to kick some ass.
Chuck Norris can travel back in time into the future.
If you use Chuck Norris in a game of Rock-Paper-Scissors, you automatically win.
When Chuck Norris was a kid his parents took him to a beach in Georgia. While swimming Chuck Norris pants came down and out popped Florida.
Chuck Norris found the stairway to heaven, but he prefers the elevator.
Bruce Lee is the only person that lived from a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris. He died a year later.
Chuck Norris can buy priceless moments. At a discount price.