Total Recall was based off of an average day in the life of Chuck Norris.
If you see the Blue Screen of Death on your laptop... it's because Chuck Norris found out you were reading Chuck Norris jokes.
Chuck Norris doesn't fall, he merely tests the durability of the floor with his face.
When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
When Chuck Norris watches TV it changes the channel for him when he asks just out of fear.
For his surprise 50th birthday party, Chuck Norris turned up early. No one surprises Chuck Norris.
May 6th, 1945: A then five-year old Chuck Norris swam the Atlantic Ocean. The next day, the Nazis surrendered...
When Chuck Norris was born, he cut his own umbilical cord. He then used it to strangle the doctor who slapped him on the but.
Chuck Norris is not impressed with your facts...