When nature calls Chuck Norris hangs up.
Chuck Norris can make ice cubes with a microwave.
Chuck Norris uses an air bag... in order to protect the inside of his car in case he stops too fast.
Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast. They taste like chicken.
When Chuck Norris forgets something it ceases to exist.
Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you’re thinking to yourself, “But Chuck Norris isn’t black”, then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.
The dark side of the moon is the side that cowers in fear of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris's sign language is heard around the world.
If Chuck Norris appears in your dream, don't panic, he is only looking for Freddy Krueger.
Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
Chuck Norris made the universe... out of his snot and left kidney.