After being shot by a criminal, Chuck Norris said... "that tickles".
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Chuck Norris doesn't play dead for bears, bears play dead for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris tells his GPS when he wants to turn.
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Chuck Norris gives Freddy Krueger nightmares.
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A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
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Chuck Norris can drive a car without gas... or an engine.
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Chuck Norris was an only child.
Eventually.
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Chuck Norris's programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.
Chuck Norris once separated his powers into five people, they are now called The Avengers.
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Chuck Norris once went logging and took down a forest.
Then he came back for his axe.
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Chuck Norris once leaned on the Tower of Pisa...
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