After being shot by a criminal, Chuck Norris said... "that tickles".
When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
If Chuck Norris were to get into a fight with another Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris would win.
Every morning Chuck Norris eats a bowl of nails for Breakfast... without milk.
Chuck Norris can answer a missed call.
Clark Kent had to call himself "Superman" because "Chuck Norris" was already taken.
Chuck Norris can hear pictures.
Some people break the laws of the state, Chuck Norris breaks the laws of physics.
Messing with Chuck Norris is the only thing that will get you disqualified from a Colonial Penn Life Insurance policy - at any age.
When a Jedi dies they become part of the force, when the force dies it becomes part of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris uses black holes to clean his dishes.