If Chuck Norris were a substance, he would abuse you.
Chuck Norris can turn diamonds back into coal.
You know Chuck Norris' pet lizard, right? Last I heard, he was in the movie "Godzilla". Oh, and his pet turtle starred in "Gamera" as well.
Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident, but he still managed to walk it off.
Chuck Norris froze hell.
Chuck Norris can freeze water using a toaster.
Wherever you go, Chuck Norris will already be there.
Chuck Norris beat Halo 3 on legendary, with a broken Guitar Hero controller.
A black hole is where Chuck Norris ripped the universe a new one.
Kings buy Chuck Norris size beds.
Chuck doesn't have e-mail, he has HE-mail.