Chuck Norris once saw Spiderman on a wall and then folded his newspaper.
Chuck Norris didn't go to school to learn, he went to teach.
When Chuck Norris put his hand over a magnet, the magnet comes to him out of pure fear.
When Chuck Norris was 12 years old, he mauled a pit bull.
Chuck Norris can actually describe the taste of purified water.
With just two toothpicks, a lightbulb, and his RoundHouse Kick, Chuck Norris can override the Pentagon's computer system.
Barcelona beats every team in the world, Chuck Norris can beat Barcelona... by himself.
Chuck Norris graduated from the School of Hard Knocks with an MBA - Mega Bad Ass.
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
Chuck Norris once shaved his beard. People now call it Bigfoot.
Chuck Norris is the only weapon allowed through airport security