Q: Why do we paint Easter eggs?
A: Because it's easier than trying to wallpaper them!
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Q: What day does an Easter egg hate the most?
A: Fry-days.
When Chuck Norris went to Easter island, he couldn't understand why other tourists kept asking him to pose for photos next to the stone monoliths.
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Did you hear about the Easter egg hunt for the Alzheimer's patients?
They hid their own eggs!
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"Why are you studying your Easter candy?"
"I'm trying to decide which came first-the chocolate chicken or the chocolate egg!"
A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands.
He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.
The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"
My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."
Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?"
He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."
Q: How does Jesus celebrate Easter?
A: He gets a manicure, pedicure, and has his nails polished.
Q: Why do only 20 percent of blonde chicks lay Easter eggs?
A: The rest are hunt'n peckers.
What happened when the Easter Bunny met the rabbit of his dreams?
They lived hoppily ever after.
Q: There is a $100 bill sitting in the middle of a 4 way intersection, at one side there is a man hating dike, at another side, there is Santa, at another side there is the Easter Bunny, and at the las side there is a man loving lesbian. Who gets the $100 bill?
A: The man hating dike because all others are a figure of your imagination.