Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
A: Of course, a house doesn't jump at all.
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A rabbit went to the fortune-teller, “what do you see in my future?” asked the rabbit.
“Very soon,” replied the fortune-teller, “you will meet a pretty young girl who will want to know everything about you.”
“That’s great!” said the rabbit, hopping up and down.
“But when will I meet her?”
“Next week in science class,” said the fortune-teller.
How did the farmer find his lost cow?
He tractor down.
A guy asks his waiter at a restaurant how they prepare their chicken.
The waiter goes blank for a second, then says, "Nothing special really... We just tell them they're going to die..."
Why do polo bears like bald men?
Because they have a great, white, bear place.
Q: What is a duck's favorite TV show?
A: The feather forecast!
What do you call an ugly rabbit that sits on someone's forehead?
Unsightly facial hare.
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you?
Your calves.
Q: What does a twelve-pound mouse say to a cat?
A: ‘Here Kitty, kitty, kitty’!
Yo' Mama is so poor, when she goes to the park, the pigeons throw her bread.