Q: Why wasn't the bodybuilder evicted?
A: Because he was squatting.
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Q: What do you say to a bodybuilding cow farmer?
A: Show us your calves!
This elliptical isn't the only thing getting my heart rate up.
Q: What do you call Santa Claus with muscles?
A: Mr. XMass
At one Army base, the annual trip to the rifle range had been canceled for the second year in a row, but the semi-annual physical fitness test was still on as planned.
One soldier mused, “Does it bother anyone else that the Army doesn’t seem to care how well we can shoot, but they are extremely interested in how fast we can run?”
My six pack is protected by a layer of fat.
The movie Unstoppable is based on Chuck Norris' morning jog.
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I quit my gym this morning because one of the instructors started shouting at me,
"Come on man, you've got to want it! Come on push. You can do it."
I hate being disturbed when I'm having a dump.
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Chuck Norris is so tough, that he doesn't get a workout from the weights,they get a workout from him.
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I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits.
He said, "How flexible are you?"
I said, "I can't make Tuesdays or Thursdays."