Joke #12193

Q: Why wasn't the bodybuilder evicted? A: Because he was squatting.

Chuck Norris leaves potholes when he jogs.

Chuck Norris is so tough, that he doesn't get a workout from the weights,they get a workout from him.

Redbull doesn't give you wings. Lat pulldowns do.

Someone call CSI. I just killed my workout.

My six pack is protected by a layer of fat.

At the gym: Me: "What does this machine do?" "Sir, that's a bench." Me: "Perfect."

When Chuck Norris finishes his workout, the gym takes a break.

One morning, while she was making breakfast, the local fitness freak walked up to his wife, pinched her on the bum and said, "You know dear if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle." This was a bit over the limit, but she controlled herself and replied with silence. Next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the breast. "You know love if you firmed these up we could get rid of your bras." That was too far over the limit. She rolled over and grabbed him by the penis. Maintaining a vice grip, she whispered in his ear, "You know dear if you firmed this up we could get rid of the postman, the pool man, the gardener and your brother."

I quit my gym this morning because one of the instructors started shouting at me, "Come on man, you've got to want it! Come on push. You can do it." I hate being disturbed when I'm having a dump.

Just been to the gym and there's a new machine. Only used it for an hour as I started to feel sick. Its good though, it does everything 'Kitkats, Mars bars, Snickers and crisps'!