Joke #12193

Q: Why wasn't the bodybuilder evicted? A: Because he was squatting.

Thank you for calling the Weight Loss Hotline. If you'd like to lose a half pound right now, press "1" 18,000 times.

Do you believe in love at first set? Or should I curl this barbell another 10 times?

I do two hours of cardio every day. But I still need to find the closest parking spot to the gym.

This guy named "John" asked advice how to lose extra LBS gained during vacation and was told about some new fitness center. So John went to check it out. Walked in, put $10 on the counter and said: "I'd like to lose 10 LBS please?!" The receptionist smiled and pointed to a pink door. John walked slowly into the room and saw only a massage table, a gorgeous scantily dressed woman on the other side. She said in a sexy voice "If you catch me, you fxxx me! " John ran around n round, caught her and... A few days later John returned. He put $20 on the counter and said "I'd like to lose 20 LBS. The smiling receptionist and pointed to a red door. John strutting to the door, and entered where he beheld 2 beautifully attired very hot n sexy women kissing and caressing each other, then they stood up, gazed at John, who was already moving toward them. And they purred "you catch us, you fuck us!" Already in motion, John ran round n round caught one, then caught the other... The following week John went back again. He smiled while searching for the door he knew was waiting for him, and slapped $50 on the counter saying excitedly "50 LBS for 50 bucks." The receptionist pointed to a black door. John strode over with quick steps, opened the door and immediately heard a deep voice belonging to the biggest blackest buck naked she-male say excitedly "I catch you I fuck you!"

Chuck Norris only works out once a year... that's about all the gym equipment can take.

The movie Unstoppable is based on Chuck Norris' morning jog.

Q: What exercise do Hairdressers do in the gym? A: Curls.

Q: Why did Arnold Schwarzenegger train on a desert island? A: He wanted maximum isolation.

What is height of Activelaziness? Asking for a lift to house while on a morning walk.

Just been to the gym and there's a new machine. Only used it for an hour as I started to feel sick. Its good though, it does everything 'Kitkats, Mars bars, Snickers and crisps'!