They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
When Chuck Norris was born, the doctor exclaimed, "It's a man!"
Sand is created by Chuck Norris shouting at rocks.
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
Chuck Norris found Nemo with his eyes closed.
Chuck Norris doesn't vote. He elects!
Chuck Norris is the only one that can turn lemonade into lemons.
The hardest known subsatance in the universe is Chuck Norris's will.
Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares. Actually he can also blow your face.