Give Chuck Norris a piece of coal and he'll give you back a diamond.
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Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.
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Two things in life are certain: Death and a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can listen to 24 hours worth of music and not move a single muscle.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen tanks when scuba diving.
He simply sucks all the life out of the ocean to breath.
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The reason we are human is because Chuck roundhouse kicked a monkey into a higher species.
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A man once insulted Chuck Norris by saying he was smarter than him.
That man was Stephen Hawking.
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Chuck Norris does not have to "Fight for his right to Party".
Parties have to fight for their right to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris watches Saturday Night Live on Friday.
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Chuck Norris knows what pi tastes like.
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Chuck Norris can't get a riddle wrong.
The riddle can only have the wrong answer.
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