Give Chuck Norris a piece of coal and he'll give you back a diamond.
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Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.
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I named my dog Chuck Norris, but I couldn't train him because no one tells Chuck Norris what to do.
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Chuck Norris does not wear a seatbelt and reclines his seat before takeoff and landing on an airplane because he can.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why Einstein's theory of relativity is still a theory.
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If Chuck Norris were a substance, he would abuse you.
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When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay:
"What is courage?"
He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
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Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris mask for Halloween.
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When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
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When Chuck Norris falls over, the ground needs a band-aid
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Chuck Norris doesn't moon walk, the moon Chuck-Norris Walks.
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