Chuck Norris can only text if the phone's touch screen is bullet proof.
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Chuck Norris does not need guns to win, he only uses them to fight fairly.
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Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies dead.
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Chuck Norris brings his fists to gunfights.
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The only reason Godzilla goes back into the ocean is because Chuck Norris is expecting him... for dinner.
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Chuck Norris leaves messages before the beep.
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All men are born equal.
Chuck Norris was just born more equal than everyone else.
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Columbus may have discovered America, but after a conversation with Chuck Norris it was decided, Chuck Norris discovered America.
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Chuck Norris dropped the apple on Isaac Newtons Head.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why Professor X is on a wheelchair.
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Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty.
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