Joke #13142

Q: What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes? A: Doyouthinkysaraus.

Q: What's the nickname for someone who put their right hand in the mouth of a T-Rex? A: Lefty.

In some quarters, bookstores may be considered dinosaurs, but odd customers are evergreen, as these requests to bookstore clerks prove. "Can you tell me who the author of Shakespeare is?" "I'm looking for a book, but I only know the title, not the author. It's called Dante's Inferno." "I definitely don't want nonfiction. I like autobiographies and history." "Do you have Shakespeare in English?"

Q: What's the best way to talk to a velociraptor? A: Long distance!

Q: What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A: A dino-snore!

One dinosaur said, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Another dinosaur said "A non-renewable recourse!"

One morning when I was going out of the house I met my neighbor's daughter who was pregnant. When I returned home I saw her father closing the door. I told him: "Your daughter hasn't married yet I wonder how it is possible a girl without any husband be pregnant? For a moment her father with a bitter smile said: "She isn't pregnant; it is all wind in her belly. She farts and would recovery." Next year perchance I saw the same girl with a baby in her arms. Next day when I was going out facing her father so I told him: "I saw your daughter with her fart in her arms."

Two drunks were walking home along the railway tracks. The first drunk says, "There's a hell of a lot of steps here." The second drunk says, "I'll tell you what's worse, this handrail is bloody low down"

Meteors didn't kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just needed a new pair of boots.

Q: What do you call a very small valentine? A: A valen-tiny!

Q: What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with Chuck Norris? A: Nothing. Nobody crosses Chuck Norris.