Chuck Norris doesn't try to find clowns they try to find him.
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Chuck Norris can suck a black hole.
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people.
It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris.
The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction.
No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
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When Chuck Norris cuts onions, the onins cry.
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Once Chuck Norris met a man on a horse that he did'nt like, now we know him as the headless horseman.
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Evolution's driving mechanism is nature's desperate attempt to escape Chuck Norris.
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Once Chuck Norris signed a cheque and the bank bounced.
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Chuck Norris has never won a single fight.
Winning would imply some sort of competition or chance that he could loose.
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We only submit these facts so he doesn't kill us.
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Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris:
I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours.
Can you?
Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?
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