Chuck Norris sends his beard clippings to the police.
They are used as bullet proof vests.
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Chuck Norris found Nemo with his eyes closed.
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Armageddon is defined as the day Chuck Norris gets bored with us.
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The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
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Chuck Norris is not cool.
By saying that, I have decreased my life to 5 seco...
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Chuck actually died four years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
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Did you know the Dinosaurs crossed Chuck Norris?
But only once.
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Chuck Norris is the only man to punch a cyclops between the eyes.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex?
Because he never fucks up.
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When Chuck Norris visits Egypt, the sand didn't burn his feet, his feet burnt the sand, hence the discovery of glass.
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Chuck Norris can unscramble eggs.
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