Chuck Norris sends his beard clippings to the police.
They are used as bullet proof vests.
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When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold.
Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.
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Chuck Norris is allowed to draw pictures of Mohammad.
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Chuck Norris once won a staredown over a walkie talkie.
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Chuck Norris does Rachel Marron's work.
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Some say Chuck once sneezed a rhino inside out.
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Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin.
The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
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Chuck Norris can play the saxophone... while holding his breath.
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Tornadoes have sirens to warn them when Chuck Norris is coming.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a theme song because, you won't hear anything once your roundhouse kicked in the face.
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Lightning doesn't strike Chuck Norris, chuck norris strikes lightning!
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