Chuck Norris sends his beard clippings to the police.
They are used as bullet proof vests.
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Chuck Norris was bitten by a werewolf.
When full moon came, the werewolf turned into Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris has a lot to contribute to the Third World...
War.
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Why did we have a global recession?
Because Chuck Norris asked "Whats a global Recession?"
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Chuck Norris sprinted 2 marathons - backwards.
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Chuck norris once ate a rubix cube and pooped it out solved.
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Chuck Norris' toothpaste doesn't have baking soda in it, it has gunpowder in it.
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The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town.
They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
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Jason Bourne fought Chuck Norris but he can't remember because now he has amnesia.
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The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
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Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as he who shall not be named.
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