How do men exercise on the beach?
By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
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What do you call a woman that works like a man??
Lazy.
Q: What is difference between man and Superman?
A: Man wears underwear under the trouser and superman wears it over the trouser.
It's Halloween and when the man answers his door, there's a well-dressed young boy there wearing a suit and matching tie, who says "Trick or treat".
The man's a bit confused so he asks the boy what he's dressed up as.
"I'm an IRS agent", says the boy, and with that, he snatches 40% of the candy, and leaves without saying thank you.
Q: What is height of Stupidity?
A: A man looking through a keyhole of a glass door.
Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
A. Both of them.
How do men define a "50/50" relationship?
We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.
Vote:
I stopped at a friend's house the other day and found him stalking around with a fly-swatter.
When I asked if he was getting any flies, he answered: "Yeah, three males and two females."
Curious, I asked how he could tell the difference.
He said: "Three were on a beer can and two were on the phone."
A man goes to his doctor and says, “I don’t think my wife’s hearing isn’t as good as it used to be.
What should I do?”
The doctor replies, “Try this test to find out for sure.
When your wife is in the kitchen doing dishes, stand fifteen feet behind her and ask her a question, if she doesn’t respond keep moving closer asking the question until she hears you.”
The man goes home and sees his wife preparing dinner.
He stands fifteen feet behind her and says, “What’s for dinner, honey?
He gets no response, so he moves to ten feet behind her and asks again.
Still no response, so he moves to five feet. Still, no answer.
Finally he stands directly behind her and says, “Honey, what’s for dinner?” She replies, “For the fourth time, I SAID CHICKEN!”