Dad: Hey son want to hear a joke?
Son: Yeah!
Dad: Pussy.
Son: I don't get it.
Dad: Exactly...
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This could be considered the ideal world for many men:
His son on the cover of a box of Wheaties.
His mistress in the centerfold of Playboy.
A picture of his wife on the milk carton.
Why are men like blenders?
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
A huge guy walks into a bar, approaches a little guy and karate chops him in the back.
When the little guy gets up, the huge guy says, "That was a karate chop from Korea."
A little later, the huge guy walks back over to the little guy and karate chops him in the back.
The huge guy says, "That was a karate chop from China."
The little guy leaves the bar, comes back and hits the huge guy on the back.
The huge guy lies unconscious on the floor.
The little guy tells the bartender, "Tell him that was a crowbar from Sears."
Q. What do you call a sensitive, intelligent man?
A. An oxymoron.
Men are like.....Horoscopes.
They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.
Men are like.....Coffee
The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.
"What is a man's idea of a balanced diet?"
"A Budweiser in each hand!"
Men are like guns.
Keep one around long enough and your going to want to shoot it.
Why is a man different from a PC?
You only have to tell the PC once.