Joke #1460

How is Colonel Sanders like the typical male? All he's concerned with is legs, breasts, and thighs.
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has 26.83 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: men

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One day a man and a giraffe go to a pub they have a couple of drinks then on their way out the giraffe falls over and blocks the door the bar. Man says "you can leave that lion here." The man said "it's not a lion its a giraffe you idiot."
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has 40.67 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, men, stupid
A guy rang up to air port and said: "Do you mind me please to ask how long is from New York to Sanfransico? The lady replied "A moment..." Then the guy said "Thank you" and ceased conversation.
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has 73.79 % from 100 votes. More jokes about: communication, men, stupid, time, travel
What is the difference between a man and E.T.? E.T. phoned home.
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has 46.10 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: men
A man, a woman, and a great survivor are trapped on an island. The survivor finds a bunch of coconuts. The man thinks to himself, "What if there are other people on the island? Then we won't be stranded!" He throws coconuts at nearby ships, and the island was populated. Everybody looks at him cross. Then they kick him off the island.
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has 26.68 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: desert island, mean, men, travel, women
Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven? Because if they all went, it would be Hell.
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has 33.28 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: heaven, men
Two men were talking about their wives. First: "I'm a teacher whenever we are in bed my wife says repeat please." Second: "I'm a driver when we are sexing she thinks I'm in a gas station so she screws my dick and says: 'fill it up super!'"
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has 43.73 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, sex, teacher, work
A man consulted his priest about getting a divorce. The priest was surprised. "Why on earth would you want to divorce such a lovely wife? She is soft and gentle and, if I may say so, she is also quite beautiful and nicely proportioned. I really can’t see what you have to complain about." The man took off his shoe. "See this shoe," he said, showing it to the priest, "The leather is soft and gentle. It is a beautiful piece of work and nicely proportioned." "Ah"” said the priest, "a parable." "In a way, Father," replied the man. "I’m the only one who knows it pinches."
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has 72.31 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: divorce, love, men, priest, wife
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mail box. She opened it, slammed it shut, and stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house and again went to the mail box and again opened it, then slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, “Is something wrong?” To which she replied, “There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps giving me a message saying, “YOU’VE GOT MAIL!”
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has 24.11 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: blonde, computer, men
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer? A: None, it better be open when she brings it to you.
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has 37.02 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: beer, men, women
He: Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way. She: Well, you succeeded.
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has 30.41 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: men