Joke #3294

Why do men buy electric lawn mowers? So they can find their way back to the house.
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How can you tell soap operas are fictional? In real life, men aren't affectionate out of bed.
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A man walks into a sperm Bank. He approaches a man who has just walked out of a donating cubicle. He decides to start a conversation with him. He approaches the man and says "So then, do you come here often?" The man replies "Only when the internets off" and walks off.
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Boy: "You know unlike all these other guys, I can make you really happy" Girl: "Why are you leaving?"
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Why don't men often show their true feelings? Because they don't have any.
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Why are men like laxatives? They can irritate the s**t out of you.
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Man walks over to a lady in a bar and asks "whats your name ?" "Carmen" she replies,... "I like cars and men ! Whats yours ?" The man looks her up and down and sayes "Beerpussy ..."
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What is the difference between men and women? A woman wants a man to satisfy their every little need. A man wants all the women to satisfy their one and only little need.
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Stupid? He wanted to be a farmer. So he studied pharmacy.
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A woman was paying for some items in a supermarket - a pint of milk, a packet of bacon, a small bag of rice and a few vegetables. The man at the checkout said, "I bet you're single, aren't you?" "Well yes, I am," the woman replied. "How did you know?" "Because you're really ugly," replied the man.
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Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating? To stop the snoring before it starts.
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