What do you call a bear with no teeth, a gummy bear!
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What is a moo hoo for a cow fight?
A cattle battle.
Why do cows think cooks are mean?
They whip cream!
What do you call it when one rabbit challenges another rabbit to hop across a forty-yard canyon?
A hare dare.
Where do Russian cows come from?
Moscow.
Why wouldn't anyone play with the little longhorn?
He was too much of a bully!
There was a man driving a pickup truck down a country road, when suddenly he was broad sided by a trailer truck.
Some time went by, and the case got to court.
The defense attorney said to the plaintiff, "How can you be suing my client now when you told a trooper after the accident that you felt fine?"
The man replied. "Well sir, it was like this. We was driving down the road, minding our own business, when a big trailer truck came out of nowhere and creamed us. When I came to, I was in the ditch, and a trooper was pulling up with his car. He looked at the hogs, and they was most dead, so he shot them. Then he looked at my dog, and he was hurt real bad, so he shot him."
Then he came over to me and he said, "How you feeling?"
I said, "I never felt better in my life."
"I can't decide whether to buy a bicycle or a cow for my farm."
"Well, wouldn't you look silly riding a cow?"
"I d look a darn sight sillier trying to milk a bicycle!"
What gives milk and has a horn?
A milk tank.
A worm gets out from cherry compote and, after he stretches a little, says satisfied:
I love sauna!
Why did President Clinton name his dog Buddy instead of Spot?
Because he didn't want people running around the White House saying, "come Spot, come Spot!"
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