What do you call a bear with no teeth, a gummy bear!
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What's the difference between a reindeer and a snowball?
They re both brown, except the snowball.
A man runs over a cat.
The cat’s address is on its collar so the man goes to apologise to the owner.
He knocks on the door and a little old lady answers.
The man says, ‘I’m so sorry.
I’ve just run over your cat.
Can I replace it?’
‘I don’t know,’ replies the old lady.
‘How are you at catching mice?’
Q: What is the pink stuff between elephant’s toes?
A: Slow clowns.
What does a cow ride when his car is broken?
A COW-asaki MOO-torcycle.
What do you call a cow who argues with her husband?
A bullfighter.
Q:What did the polar bear say when they saw tourists in sleeping bags?
A:Mmmm, sandwiches!
First Kangaroo: What do you call it when giraffes moving one way get mixed up with giraffes moving another way?
Second Kangaroo: A giraffic jam.
A cat died and went to heaven. St. Peter said to the cat, "Is there anything I can do to make your stay here better?"
The cat said, "I've been sleeping on a cold floor and I'd love a warm pillow to sleep on.
St. Peter gave a pillow to the cat, and the cat headed off to bed.
Later, some mice came to St. Peter. They wanted roller skates to get around faster so St. Peter gave them their skates and the mice went off.
The next evening St. Peter checks in on the cat. "How was your night last night?"
The cat said "That pillow you gave me is really nice, but what I like the most about heaven is the Meals on Wheels."
What do cows like to listen to?
Moo-sic.